I know that a lot of you live in warm places but let me tell you, this Kansas girl considers it a BIG deal to have leaves and sunlight in December. I mean, I don’t even think Dallas has wind! I think I went through the entire weekend and never once had to get a curl out of my lipstick that was thrown into my lipstick.
I saved so much money not having to reapply lipstick over and over again and it wasn’t dry so instead of buying a new NARS Niagra, I spent that $27 on a Spiced Pear Moscow Mule which was also $27 but let me tell you what, that thing was worth it. Think Moscow Mule + a slightly spiced pear + happiness + the feeling that Beyonce’s assistants feels when she gives praise. I mean that last feeling alone was worth $27.
Dallas was ridiculously charming and made me want to move there stat. The arts district, the food trucks, the shopping, the way everyone was so freaking nice was just all too charming and made me actually consider saying “y’all” because it was just the freaking cutest thing. but I am from Kansas thus I say you guys and you all.
I would like to say that I had a totally hilarious story about something that happened to me or like I fell down a bunch of stairs but nope. I was a totally normal human. Although I did basically only know parts of Dallas based on my consumption of Bravo TV shows that featured Dallas, my favorite Dallas Instagram accounts and basically planning a trip via hashtags I found on Instagram. Let me tell you, if you want to see the cool places you definitely should research the local hashtags because they will find hidden gems for you and make you avoid looking like a tourist.
Oh and let’s talk about The Galleria. First off, there is such a thing as valet parking for the mall. You. Guys. This. Is. What. The. Lord. Intended. But then I realized that the Lord did not intend for the mall to be on earth. You know what to go to human hell with recycled air, the smell of fast food, the despair of parents trying to control their children, too many lights, stores that think spraying cologne through the doors will lure people in and the feeling that no matter how much you walk, you are never going to exit. This is not what the Lord intended. I just wanted to go to Zara. That’s it. Zara. I walked in and realized that this was not going to be just a simple walk, no, it was going to involve a lot more. Escalators, maps, realizing that people in Texas think 60 is freezing so you realize you are sweating from being inside and the temp.
I made it to Zara. It took 10 minutes. I walked around Zara and wasn’t even sure what to do. I mean, I definitely wanted to be there, but the thought of having parked on the opposite side and walking upstream made me feel sit down and just wonder how people did this. I was thirsty. I was sweating. I was ready to leave. I also really wanted some shoes though. So I compromised. I stand in line for 34 minutes, get the shoes and then get a Diet Coke. 34 minutes later I got said Diet Coke. I sat down. I then realized that I was never going back again. Ever. And then a kid crawled around me and I realized the mall life is just not for me.
But you guys, you should definitely visit Dallas because they have amazing BBQ, the perfect Instagram backgrounds, food that will make you question why you don’t live there and the nicest people. Just avoid Galleria.